“I felt like I was abusing my gift that God gave me,” Timbaland said of his drug use affecting his music
Timbaland is coming clean.
The Grammy award-winning rapper and producer, 47, stopped by Tamron Hall on Wednesday and opened up about overcoming his opioid addiction.
Timbaland, born Tim Mosley, talked to Hall about the beginning of his addiction, which he said started after he was prescribed opioids following a dental procedure.
“It takes over you. It’s something that takes over your body,” he explained. “I don’t want to glorify it, but it feels amazing. It makes you feel like a superhero. It gave me confidence.”
Timbaland went on to further discuss functioning on the pills and how it affected his music career.
“The pills make you function, but sometimes you would nod off while people were talking to you because it would make you fall asleep, but it would make you function because everything feels great,” he said.
“It could be a bad moment going on, but the pills block all that out. I thought some of the pills were making me create, but as I went back to listen to some of my music I was like, ‘Oh this is not a creation, this is a hot mess.’”
Timbaland Lost 130 Lbs. After Overcoming Painkiller Abuse: ‘I Had a Dream that Death Was Near’
His addiction, like that of many others, began to negatively affect his relationship with ex-wife Monique Mosley and his children as well.
“My marriage was new and I was scared of it. I think the pills helped me deal with the marriage at the time,” he said. “But when I had my daughter and my son, I kept looking like, ‘I want to be here for my kids’ and it just hit me one day. I didn’t go to rehab; I cut cold turkey. My kids were my backbone to living.”
Timbaland also discussed shedding his ego and what it was like to come out publicly about his drug addiction. “I think people forget that we are still human and I had to realize that I’m still that guy from the country, I’m just great at music,” he said. “I felt like I was abusing my gift that God gave me and when I was on the drugs, he took that gift away.”
The “If We Ever Meet Again” rapper spoke openly with Men’s Health earlier this year and detailed that he lost 130 lbs. after overcoming his addiction.
He shared that he lost 50 lbs. in the first year, and then started working out twice a day before deciding to join a trainer at a new gym where he focused on exercises that incorporated squat, lunge, hinge, push, pull, twist and gait movements.
But with the weight shed and his mind in a better, clearer place, he said he doesn’t feel “complete” — which he prefers.
“I don’t want to ever feel like I’m complete, ’cause my mind would probably get idle,” he said. “God needed me to be clear so I could see what is needed, not what I want.”